I just finished checking one of my favorite blogs, wearethatfamily and it hit me.
I have been complaining way too much about the Wook being sick with a cold,ear infection, teething. I have been back in my little woe is me bubble.
Kristen asked for prayer for some blogland babies and I started exploring. I read about these families who are going through heartbreak over the serious illnesses their children battle. One little girl is going home only to get ready to go home to be with the Lord. Thank God these families have Him. They all praise Him through these times.
I felt small. I felt self centered. I felt sick. Sick for all the times I whine and complain about missing sleep when Wook has had a cold. Guilty for all the complaints about doctor visits and waiting. Sick that I take so much for granted. I have been so self centered.
I bowed my head and thanked God for our health. For the health of my child. I asked that these families would feel His loving arms around them. I don't know them but I cried for them. Each one. I thanked God for giving me perspective this morning.
I have had that perspective before. That October I prayed more in those 3 weeks than I ever have. I grew in my relationship with Him like I never have. I got angry and asked why her. I tried to make deals. And then I felt His arms. For the first time I didn't pray for what I wanted. I prayed for whatever would save her. He did. She pulled through it. One "robot leg" later. She is tough and my "favorite girlfriend".
Sometimes I forget what that kind of closeness to Him feels like. I said I would never let it go. I take that for granted too. That is the only way these people can be getting through this.
I want to go in Wookie's room and pick him up from his peaceful nap and hold him close to me. Feel his breath on my neck. Rub his back and look at his beautiful long eyelashes. Honestly, even though it is so hard sometimes I too believe God. He will take care of these babies. And mine too.